Holding Onto Hope Read online

  “You don’t.” For the first time since he’d known her, she sounded genuinely subdued. “We’ll go back now—back to the house.”

  He pushed onto his elbows. “Look, I never saw those guys before in my life. I honestly don’t know why they were here.”

  “It wasn’t for you.” She stood and dusted her pants off before she offered him a hand. “Listen, I don’t know how long we have until they send more assassins. We have to get back.”

  Still slightly in shock, he simply nodded.

  “Was that your first time to kill someone?” Elantria asked him. He could see her trying to take refuge in her curiosity.

  “No.” His stomach heaved. “But, the first time…other people got hurt because I didn’t stop a killer. I swore I wouldn’t make the same mistake again.”

  She nodded and accepted this piece of information with only a flicker of her lashes. She looked at the statues as they left the temple, and Ben realized that, for all her flippant words, her climbing there had been her form of prayer.

  And that this would never be a sanctuary for her again.

  Chapter Twelve

  Elantria led Ben through the streets so quickly that he could almost not keep up. She didn’t look around but he sensed that she was aware of everything that went on. He saw her catch someone’s eye as they entered the neighborhood where his house was, and at the man’s miniscule nod, she relaxed.

  It made him wonder exactly how many lookouts she had and if any of them had seen him follow her the day before.

  He couldn’t afford to focus on that, he knew, but the thought circled in his mind. Who was Elantria? Was she the Robin Hood of this city, an elven bastard who knew how the nobility worked and yet bore them no loyalty? Or had it all been lies and she was nothing but a jumped-up crime boss with a sad backstory, who traded on that to get away with… Well, whatever it was that got assassins sent after you.

  “I’ll have food and bandages sent to your room,” she told him when they entered. “Don’t go in the courtyard if you can avoid it.”

  She disappeared without another word and he climbed the stairs to his room with his mind racing and his gut twisting. If Elantria wasn’t who she claimed to be—if she was evil—it meant he had killed someone who tried to make the city safer.

  In which case, he was the one standing in the way of justice.

  “Are you all right?” Prima asked as he reached his room.

  “I…don’t know.” He exhaled a long breath and touched the lamp in the center of the space to turn it on, then went to his bed and sat with a sigh.

  The corridors in the house were kept grimy and dark, which meant he had been surprised to see this room. Nothing in it was particularly elegant but all of it was well maintained. The floor was swept clean and a broom was propped in one corner. A small table held a pitcher of water and towels for him to bathe. There was a little trunk for his things and a low bed covered in a faded quilt. The floor had a rag rug.

  And the lamp, of course, was magical.

  The windows that looked onto the courtyard were covered with a wooden screen that was carved to let a fair amount of sunlight in, but right now, they weren’t in the path of the sun.

  Ben eased his boots off and wiggled his toes. When there was a knock at the door, he called, “Come in.”

  A human woman entered. She had a tray with more of the egg-and-pastry packets and a steaming cup of hot tea, as well a small stack of books. With a smile, she handed the tray to him and went into the hallway to retrieve something else from another servant. They murmured to one another and she returned with the set of trial locks and the lock picking tools.

  She pointed to the small wire that ran along one wall. “You can ring for us if you need us—or come downstairs and find us if you like.”

  He nodded and murmured a thank you.

  It certainly didn’t feel like he was being held captive by a crime boss. Zaara had known Elantria and she had saved Kural’s life once. He tucked his feet under him and began to eat the pastries. Now that he could smell food, he realized he was ravenous, not to mention a little queasy.

  An early start, a workout, and a huge adrenaline rush—all before breakfast—would do that to you.

  “If Zaara and Kural had any doubts, they wouldn’t have let me stay without warning me specifically,” he said finally into the silence.

  Prima remained silent.

  “I know you can’t confirm or deny anything, but it would be nice to have you weigh in.”

  “I see. I will do my best.”

  “So, Elantria was already known to them and helped them, and both of them seem to be ethical people who cared about my safety. Now, it is possible that she has changed since they knew her. But if she’s a hard-hearted woman, she would almost certainly have decided I was more trouble than I was worth.”

  “You should hope she doesn’t realize that.”

  “Hey!”

  “You said it first, not me.” She was unrepentant. “And you’re right. You’re not physically capable enough to be the best candidate for her apprentice, nor are you knowledgeable enough. There must be others who have more of an understanding of the city as well as experience in pick-pocketing and running cons.”

  “I hope you’re going somewhere good with this,” he said grumpily.

  “I was agreeing with you. However, I remember now that you had requested I not use facts.”

  Ben threw his hands up.

  “Eat your eggs.”

  He stuffed one of the egg packets into his mouth and chewed contemplatively. “So, either she took me in out of pity—which she seems to hate when it’s directed at her—or she’s running a far more complicated con. I think, in this case, Occam’s Razor would say she’s only trying to help a newbie and she’s intrigued by how different I am.”

  “Am I supposed to suggest that she’s attracted to you?”

  “No,” he said emphatically.

  “Thinking of Eliza, are we?”

  “Shut up.” He groaned and buried his face in his hands. “I knew I never should have mentioned her.”

  “Yes, but you did, and now I know.” Prima sounded deeply pleased. “In any case, if you want my analysis—”

  “As someone who technically created her but now is theoretically unaware of what she’s doing and why?”

  “Yes.”

  “Sure, go ahead.” Ben wanted to laugh but there was no one to laugh with.

  “Elantria seems to be genuinely interested in change. She knows you caught the eye and patronage of two relatively powerful people and that they trust you, and she’s trying to do something good in the city—what she sees as good, anyway. The data, as you are aware of it, would suggest either that she’s not willing to leave you to fend for yourself, that she thinks you might have some unconventional perspective that could change the city for the better…or some combination of both.”

  He frowned and thought about this. “What do you mean, the data as I am aware of it?”

  “I mean you have limited information and processing capability. I have no idea how humans make decisions at all. You might as well simply roll dice.”

  That teased a grin from him. He was about to answer when he heard a door open and close in the courtyard and the sound of voices. Quickly, he stood to look and managed to catch a glimpse of the two servants greeting an elf with blond hair and deathly pale skin.

  “Apologies,” the newcomer said. “I only managed to shake my pursuers for long enough to get to this entrance.”

  “Not a problem,” one of the servants said. “She’s waiting for you.”

  The elf nodded and headed inside with the servants in tow.

  “Phew.” Ben looked at the sky with a small smile. “I was worried it was another set of assassins.”

  “A reasonable concern. She said the assassins weren’t there for you, which would make it likely the house was being watched.”

  “If they weren’t there for me, why would they want my head?�
��

  “I can’t answer that for you.”

  “Hmm.” He flopped on the bed and considered his options. After a moment, he stood, eased the door open, and peered down the corridor in both directions.

  “Where are you going?”

  He pointed downward.

  “Are you trying to repeat yesterday’s espionage triumph?”

  The fact that he knew she enjoyed needling him when he couldn’t afford to respond made it worse. He glowered and crept to the stairs, trying to walk lightly but not as if he were trying to sneak.

  How did people normally walk? He was verging on the ministry of silly walks again.

  In the main entry area, he descended the stairs with all the insouciance he could muster and set off in the direction Elantria had taken when they returned. A narrow corridor stretched to the back of the house and two doors led off it.

  It didn’t lend itself particularly well to creeping. Ben hurried down the hallway with all the exaggerated sneakiness he could muster. He could not afford for her to hear him. It wasn’t long before he heard voices, although they remained indistinct.

  He inched toward the door and tilted his head. It was a fairly vulnerable position but at least he could mostly make the words out now.

  “I’m tempted to simply ship him off,” Elantria said. “But I can’t be sure it’s safe.”

  “I can’t say I blame them for the assumption,” the elven man said. “I drew the same conclusion. I was writing you a letter to ask about it when I got your invitation. When was the last time you had an apprentice?”

  “You,” she said bluntly. “And you know that.”

  “Precisely. I wanted to know about my successor.” The man sounded like he was smiling. “Oh, come now. You don’t need to look so grim. He’s not injured—or, it seems, traumatized—and he helped you out of a bad situation. There would have been assassins anyway.”

  “I’m worried about what I’ve set in motion,” Elantria said, followed by the creak of a chair. “I’ve worked so hard to keep the situation stable and now, I go and do this?” She sighed. “We were all in…equilibrium. Now they think I’m training an assassin and the game has changed.” She added wryly, “And I don’t even have an assassin-in-training to help with that.”

  “I wouldn’t be so sure. He did kill one of them.” In the long pause after that statement, Ben pictured the elf looking at Elantria. Maybe he was waiting for her to talk or was formulating his thoughts. A moment later, he said, “Look… You knew they would target you sooner or later. You can only rob so many banks before they do.”

  Elantria made no reply.

  “It’s the truth,” he said bluntly. “Be honest with yourself. You always tried to upset the balance of the city.”

  “No, I didn’t.” She sounded angry. “I’m not a revolutionary. I know better than to try that. I won’t go around insisting on new laws or ending corruption or whatever all of them want.”

  “Elantria.” He was half-amused but clearly not willing to dance around the topic. “You’re standing in the way of how money flows in this city, you’re doing it on purpose, and you keep trying to find new ways to do more of it. The simple fact is that you’re changing things and you know it. You can dress it up however you like, but you always knew they wouldn’t simply let you get away with it without a fight.”

  Whatever her response, it was lost in the noise from the front of the house. Ben heard voices—the two servants. He jerked and his heart pounded. They were coming closer, and it sounded like they were carrying something. The logical explanation was that they were bringing food for Elantria and her guest, but there was no way for him to get out of the corridor without it being obvious that he had been spying. He considered his options, came up with a lie on the spur of the moment, and prayed for courage.

  Then, he raised his hand and knocked on the door.

  Chapter Thirteen

  A moment of silence was broken by hurried footsteps. The door opened to reveal Elantria.

  “Yes?” She was not happy to be interrupted.

  “Hi,” Ben said awkwardly. “You said to not go outside, so I came looking for you after working on the locks. It seemed like you were talking to someone.” He peered in to see the elf.

  The visitor looked deeply amused and nodded to him. Everything about his features was well-bred and haughty, but his personality belied that. He remembered his amusement and pragmatism pitted against Elantria’s pessimistic outlook during the brief conversation he’d heard.

  “The new apprentice,” he said and pushed to his feet.

  “Orien,” she said warningly.

  “What? He’s here and I want to meet him.” Orien moved closer to shake his hand. “Besides, if we’re discussing what to do with him, he might as well be a part of that discussion.”

  The woman looked deeply unhappy with this. His instinct was to step back and leave but he was curious. Even on short acquaintance—or, more accurately, eavesdropping—he liked Orien and he wanted to know what Elantria was up to.

  So, pretending not to notice her forbidding expression, he looked from one to the other. “Do I need to leave the city?”

  “Perhaps,” the elf said before she could answer. “Come, sit. Breakfast is being brought.”

  “He’s already eaten,” she said sternly. “Ben, Orien and I are discussing confidential business.”

  “Business that involves him.” Orien looked pleasantly at her.

  “Ben.” Elantria held the door open. “If you would give the two of us some time, I will find you later and we can discuss—”

  “Oh, for pity’s sake.” For the first time, there was a hint of steel in the visitor’s manner. “You took him on as an apprentice. You involved him in this. Now, either you made a careless, reckless mistake with someone else’s life or you thought he was worth training. So, which of those two is it?”

  Murder lurked in her eyes. She opened her mouth to answer but stepped back with a sigh when the two servants entered. Both seemed acutely aware of her mood, and they set the food out and scurried away quickly.

  Elantria closed the door behind them and folded her arms.

  “He’s not from here,” she told Orien. “He was helpless. I couldn’t let him fall prey to whoever decided to scam him.”

  Now was the time when he had to decide whether to go forward or sit passively. In the past… well, in the past, he wouldn’t have bothered with this. He would have taken his pack and headed off to another job, another move, or another country.

  That had always counted as a sign of strength on his part in his mind—that he was willing to walk away from people who tried to speak down to him.

  He saw now that it had merely been a way to avoid the confrontation. In all the situations he’d gone through, he’d never stood his ground. He had never learned to do that—and he wanted to.

  Calmly, he met Elantria’s gaze as he said, “If that was your concern, you could easily have let me leave with Zaara and Kural.”

  “Kural was here?” Orien asked with great interest.

  “That is not important,” she snapped but sighed a moment later. “Very well, he’s a puzzle. He looked entirely incompetent”—her stony gaze said that she wouldn’t go easy on him merely because he’d stood his ground—“but Kural and Zaara both spoke well of him, which intrigued me. I wanted to see his way of being effective. I wondered if he might be useful here.”

  “And there you have it,” the elf said cheerfully. He went to serve himself breakfast and said to him, “Elantria sees anyone and everything as tools to be used or obstacles to be dealt with—or as useless things to be ignored. Don’t take it personally. Being considered either a tool or an obstacle is high praise.”

  She scowled and served breakfast for herself. “I am not like that.”

  “Yes, you are.” He took a bite of bread. To Ben, he said, “Until yesterday, I was the only apprentice she had ever trained. I was curious about you.”

  “He’s not my ap
prentice.”

  “You’re training him,” Orien pointed out. When Ben looked from one to the other in irritation, he smiled. “We’re confusing you, no doubt. Elantria, here, is one of the foremost thieves in Heffog—but she doesn’t work for the black market, which annoys them, and also doesn’t work for what’s left of the elven nobility, which annoys them. She does everything she can to reverse the profit the nobles and merchants wring out of the populace.”

  “Will you keep talking about me like I’m not here?” she asked acidly.

  “Yes. Now, you see, she is presently working against a specific syndicate, so they’ve kept a close eye on her. Everyone’s waiting for someone else to make the first move. And what should happen but a strange man from outside the city arrives—in the presence of a notable wizard, no less—and she takes him under her wing. They assumed you were here to be her pet assassin, and…well, as you saw this morning, they wanted to head that one off at the pass.”

  “Ah,” Ben said when the explanation finally made sense.

  Elantria sat quietly and looked immensely unhappy.

  “She doesn’t like admitting she miscalculated,” Orien said in a stage whisper.

  “Enough.” She had clearly had enough of being needled. “Yes. I took Ben on to train him without considering how the Regents would interpret it. I was rather more interested in his background than I should have been and decided to train him with the hope that he might be an asset, but without the expectation.”

  “I think that’s personal growth,” the elf said. At her glare, he added hastily, “Not a joke!”

  She looked somewhat mollified.

  “I want to help,” Ben said honestly.

  “Why?” She sipped her coffee which was so strong, he could swear it woke him up simply by the smell. “You’re not from here. Why do you care about the poor of a fading city?”

  “Because—” He broke off. This was how he did things. He spoke without thinking and let anything fall out of his mouth at random but he didn’t want to do that anymore. “Because I don’t like unfair things,” he said finally. “I came to this land to heal after my accident and without meaning to, I got caught up in something bigger than myself. I helped the fae and that made me realize I could do things like that. I don’t know anyone here, but I do know I don’t like them being exploited.”